One year ago...

Have you ever had one of those days where you have soooo much to do but have asbsolutely NO ambition? Well, today is one of those days... I woke up and the rain was dripping slowly from the gray sky, my neck shot pain throughout my back and I desired to turn over and sleep the day away, yet a day off only comes once a week so I did not want to waste a moment...so I got up, read my devotions and still felt worn out...I thought maybe it was because yesterday was such a big day (which is why I did not blog) with all of the activities of he Tailgait Party at church or that the weather was making me somber...It wasn't until I was brewing some espesso that I discovered what just may be the issue of saddness...Today makes an entire year since I last saw my brother.

Landen and Joyanna came to visit me last year as part of thier first Anniversary trip. I was quite honored that they squeezed me into their itenary. It was only a couple night stay but we made the most of every moment. I showed them all around Roky Mount...which took all of one evening...then we were off to the outer banks on the most humidly hot weekend of the year! We ate fish, walked the beach, camped out, visited Roanoke Island and the Elizabethean Gardens and flew kites at Kitty Hawk. There were several negative parts about the little trip out of town but they made it all the more memorable. Along with it being a very hot weekend, peacocks pecked our tent and a large Hispanic family celebrated throughout the night so our sleep was slim... we bought marshmallows and chocolate striped cookies to make smores but were unable to make them because it did not cool down at night (in fact this summer I came across the marshmallows and made smores with some friends)...We wasted 2 hours at the Roanoke Island museum watching an informational video about Wanchese and Manteo rather than information about the Lost Colony and it rained the afternoon we went to the Elizabethean Gardens so Landen had to run all the way back to the car in pouring rain to retrieve umbrellas for us girls to enojy the rest of the sloshy afternoon. We did find some great places to dine and drink coffee along the beach and we discovered a new joy in flying kites. That Friday evening we flew kites for 3 hours at Kitty Hawk on the Dunes. Landen and I always enjoyed the idea of flying kites but were never able to keep the kite in the air longer than 20 seconds but the beach is the perfect place to fly kites...I wish I could find the video of us flying kites but sadly enough it could not be found...hopefully at a later time I will be able to post the video! We ran up and down the dunes, relaxed watching our kites in the air and giggled until we could no longer. I love that!

They left on a Sunday...but stayed so they could go to my church to see where I minister because that was important to them. That Sunday was Family Sunday and I baptized for the first time. I knew it was a huge honor for me but I never thought my brother saw it such as such great honor to be present and a part of this moment... until not long ago Joyanna told me that he mentioned several times how proud he was of me and how glad he was able to be there and be a part of my life. My brother forever thought I was the best...for whatever reason...but isn't it great to have at least one person in your life who thinks you can do anything and be wonderful at everything ...even if it is not true? I think so...and now you understand why it pains my heart so deeply that my brother is gone... but God is good to be my ever present help in trouble, to comfort me with his Holy Spirit and surround me in the love of people. I am thankful...even if Landen is never replaced...I have hope. Hope in Jesus and hope that I will see Landen again...soon I trust...and sometimes I imagine singing and worshipping in heaven, exploring the wonders to show me later and sometimes I even imagine him flying kites like we did a year ago at Kitty Hawk.